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Joy of Giving

We all love receiving gifts. Sometimes we enjoy giving them too. But most of the time we evaluate what the receiver deserves, what we have received from him or her till now, and whether we will get any returns if we give him a gift.

That is where we lose out on the true joy of giving. For if something is given with the slightest of expectation, including a smile or a ‘Thank You,’ then we are measuring our joy by the response of the receiver, and it may not be up to our expectation.

In fact it is said that we should be thankful to the receivers of whatever we give, because if theywerenot there to receive our gifts, we would not be able to experience the joy of giving. Often we tend to feel a little superior when we ‘give,’ not understanding that we received it from somewhere else in the first place. Even when we say that we ‘earned’ something, we could have still been denied it, or it could have been stolen from us, or it may have been dysfunctional or inappropriate. Hence when we keep receiving, the natural thing is to give—if nothing else, to make room for receiving something else!

TRUE SPIRIT OF MAHATMA GANDHI

Recently I had read about some tribes in African jungles, where every person immediately gives away anything not needed by him to someone who does not have the same item. They don’t use money, they don’t buy or sell anything – and yet no one’s needs remain unfulfilled. It is in the true spirit of Mahatma Gandhi who said, “the world has enough for everyone’s need, but not enough for everyone’s greed.” Imagine living in a society where we are sure we will get whatever we need, and we can freely give away something that is cluttering our house when we don’t need it!

“GIVING GROUPS”

Similarly, I read on the Internet that there are ‘Giving Groups’ in USA and other countriesthat form something like ‘self-help groups.Each person announces anything extra that he has, and anyone in the group, on first-come basis,may ask for it and just take it. Despite initial fears that people will take advantage of others’ generosity, I am told most groups are working quite successfully, and their members get so many things free which they would otherwise have to buy.

GIFTS NEED NOT BE VALUABLE THINGS

Even though we come from a long culture and tradition of charity and giving, philanthropy is no longer rampant in today’s India. When we see examples of billionaires like Bill Gates or Warren Buffett giving away the bulk of their wealth for useful causes, we wonder why our rich men do not follow suit.

But I think the answer lies not in focusing on other rich people. Let us decide that we ourselves are rich enough to give, and just start giving a little more than what we were giving earlier. The concept will build momentum over time.

Gifts can be simple things made by hand, and they can also be non-material gifts. Some hand-made greeting cards from children have been some of my most valued possessions, and I have a thick file where I preserve them carefully. Remember the story of the poor little girl who gave a gift-wrapped box to her father? When he opened it, he found it was empty! He started scolding his child, but between tears she said, “Dad, it is not empty. I have blown a hundred kisses into the box for you to de-stress when you have too much work in the office.”

What a precious thought. How often we too miss out on such precious gifts because they come wrapped up in very ordinary packages?

Dr. Ali Khwaja, B Tech (IIT), MIE, MIIM, Ph.D, Chairman, Banjara Academy—an ardent student of life and passionate lover of all human-beings alike—makes you aware of the critical fact that emotions do matter. 

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